I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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