I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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