I'm going to jail i love you
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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