sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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