Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
