So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
