I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize