She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.