For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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