those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
