So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
