yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
