yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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