I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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