Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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