and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Randomize
