She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
