super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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