sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
