My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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