And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
