Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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