We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
