Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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