Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
