I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
