Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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