sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
