but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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