based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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