That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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