Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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