at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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