I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
