have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
