When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize