32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Everything about him screamed your future.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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