I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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