i barfeds in our rink
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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