Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
