Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
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