if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
