She went from zero to smokin in five shots
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I believe in your delicious
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
