I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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