I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
