Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
