I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
