Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
