We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
