everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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