smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
