You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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