I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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